I recently received an email from a mom who wanted help in making her 17-year-old daughter do better in school and at home. While counseling in such situations is possible, the mom missed the point—at 17-years-old it is totally irrelevant what the mom wants the daughter to do, if the daughter does not want to do it.
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While spanking a 17-year-old girl may be beneficial in helping the girl to succeed in school, work or at home, it is the girl who must want to succeed. Although I can often help with such girls, they are never shown in any movies since a girl must be 18 to be filmed.
However, her mom wrote to me the following, and it may help other moms and daughters where the daughter needs help academically, at home or at work.
Found your websites a few weeks ago and been looking through it all, do you still provide a service, I’m actually wanting my daughter to be seen. She’s 17 so she might be too young. If not I have a few things that could be dealt with and could apply the techniques when home.
I possibly can help you. Your daughter is not too young for counseling and discipline, but I need more information. She has to be 18 for any filming, but that is not the question.
Where do you live? What problems need to be corrected? Does your daughter want to be corrected? If she is just rebellious, there probably is not much that I can do to help until she outgrows her “stage”.
Send me more info and I’ll see what can be done.
Oh Great, well I want her to get a real taste, I can only do so much, I have told her in the past I will get someone else to deal with her, she’s quite little but her attitude and laziness is beyond a joke, she is more than aware that this will happen and she joked that she was okay with it. So I said fine we will. I only have so much weight behind me ha-ha, what could you do? Think she needs a bit more than a sore bum!
Again, where do you live?
Before anything is done, I will have to meet with both of you to get a better idea of just what the problem is. Spankings are only a part of what can be done, but the main thing is to determine what her goals are.
If the daughter “joked” that she was OK with the discipline, then she is not OK with it. A girl of any age must actually want to succeed. The mom is correct, however, that the girl needs more than a “sore bum”. In fact, that is not the problem at all. She does not need a “sore bum”, she needs personal motivation to accomplish something. Direct counseling and conversation is most likely all that is needed for this girl, but, as we will see, she did not even want that! I would not recommend spanking her at all. I would recommend just finding out why she is so lazy and has absolutely no ambition at all to succeed at anything. Essentially, this girl is not only lost to her mom, she is lost to herself since she does not even have enough ambition to write and discuss what can be done, let alone meet to get something done, which may include some spankings, but not on her bare bottom, just some good, hard OTK spankings! Spankings may help, but only if she has some ambition to start with, which she does not.
Sorry, Waterloo, Iowa, I understand yeah, Mostly I think she needs to get herself into action with school and social life, she is lazy, not the best grades. What do you do normally after a meeting, how do you “punish” or “correct”.
Unfortunately, you are too far away for me to really assist you, unless you can get to Columbus, Ohio possibly for a weekend.
That said, the first thing that has to be done for any positive counseling or correction is to have her contact me. So far, I have only heard what you want her to do. My “correction” is only positive, and I never make a girl do anything. Either she wants to improve her own life or she does not. If she does not, then there is nothing I can do.
My program is actually very positive and I provide a lot of positive encouragement and direction and assistance in helping a girl to succeed. Does she want better grades? Does she want a better social life? Does she want to do something other than be lazy?
Have her contact me and I’ll see if I can help her, if she even wants to be helped.
I really cannot give any suggestions until I hear from your daughter.
I did not hear from her, and I sent the following message:
I had to leave for a while, but I had one more message that you might want to pass on to your daughter:
Do you want to just be a worthless girl with no goals and no accomplishments? Or do you want to actually make something of your life? The choice is yours … At 17, no one can now make you do anything with your life. You can either be a parasite or you can work to accomplish great things in your life. The choice is yours. I am sure that you are quite capable of doing many things, but you must want to do them.
I wish you all the best with your daughter, but at 17, you have already lost her in terms of you making her do anything. Hopefully she will wake up and do better while she still has a chance. There was just a story on the news about a 20+ year old guy who was still living off his parents, and has been nothing but a parasite. They had to go to court to get him out of their home.
So, what can be done? Well, actually not much of anything as long as the girl is just a worthless little girl.
